This Week In Tonight In American Idol [21 March 2007 Edition]

9:00 PM: Top 11 Week Results Show is here...

9:04 PM: After last night's recap, Peter Noone sings "There's A Kind Of Hush All Over The World".

It's better than anything any of the guys have sung all season long.

9:11 PM: This week's Idol group "Ford commercial" is a cover of Sam Cooke's "It's Another Saturday Night". As I've said before, American Idol could do worse than having a "Sam Cooke" week.

9:12 PM: The very unfunny Brad Garrett is in the house. NEXT!

[Brad Garrett is in the house to pimp his show "Til Death", which -- what a coincidence!!! -- airs immediately after tonight's results show... -- Ed.]

9:12 PM: The first person to leave tonight is...BRAD GARRETT!!!

9:12 PM: Okay, the real eliminations...Phil Stacey, Melinda Doolittle, Blake Lewis...SAFE!

9:13 PM: Next...Chris Sligh, LaKisha Jones, Jordin Sparks...SAFE!

9:14 PM: Next...Sanjaya Malakar, Haley Scarnato, Gina Glocksen...SAFE!

9:15 PM: Next...Stephanie Edwards, Chris Richardson...BOTTOM 2!!!

9:20 PM: Time for this week's "American Idol challenge". Which of these American Idols has recently been cast in "The Color Purple" on Broadway?:

a) Fantasia Barrino
b) Paris Bennett
c) Vonzell Solomon

[If you were watching THREE FUCKING WEEKS AGO, you would know the answer -- Ed.]

9:22 PM: LuLu sings the theme from To Sir With Love.

It's better than anything any of the guys have sung all season long.

9:26 PM: Ryan pimps the "Idol Cares" thing again...My sister and I agree that we coulda been outta here already...

9:28 PM: Stephanie and Chris R. are on the hot seat. Chris Richardson is...SAFE! Stephanie Edwards is GOING HOME!!!

Ryan tells us that "over 30 million votes" were cast this week.

Not only did DialIdol not have this right -- they had Stephanie in 8th place, and Chris Richardson in 7th place -- America did not have this right. The worst three performances of the night were not even in the Bottom 2!!!

AWESOME!!!

We are subjected to another week of SANJAYA MALAKAR!!!

Come back next week -- if you dare...